1. I am a waitress. I used to have these fantasies where I'd be at work and Sofia Coppola would come in to eat, stop me, gasp, and cry out "you are singlehandedly delivering the greatest performance of any actress of your generation!!" Tonight Joe told me that a. I'm not doing that great of a job acting and b. customers leave me lower tips because of it. The sad part - the really, really sad part - is that I was trying - like really TRYING - to be friendly and nice and have a good memory and talk to people and whatever. Obviously, I'm not cut out for this. Joe said he got an email from a customer saying that I was snide and that people say I'm sarcastic. I actually can't say I disagree. This job is way more work that I thought it would be.
2. I feel like I'm slacking off so much at the lab all because of this other job. But it's like... my career... so why do I keep fucking it up?? Damn the money!
3. I haven't exercised in like 2 months. I just work and drink. And sleep because I'm so fucking tired all the time. Which is so, so bad. I don't even drink wine anymore, I just drink beer. God. Okay, that does it - I'm off the beer, I just decided.
4. I'm depressed now.
5. I can't believe Joe said that people think I have an "interesting" personality. Like "weird", but for adults. Shit, this is high school all over again.
6. I'll just stop now. Here's a song that's been helping to zen me out: